RULES FOR EATING CHOCOLATE
* If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
* Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
* The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car.
The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
* Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
* If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge.
* Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
* If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet?
Don't they actually counteract each other?
* Money talks. Chocolate sings.
* Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.
* Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
* A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
* If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?